Wayback Machine. Internet Archive.
Title concept:
Word play on the book and movie title “Eat Pray Love”, substituting three different words with three different meanings while maintaining a mirror-image rhyme.
Conceit -boast and brag with swagger
Play -goofy, light-hearted & mischievous
Above -being thoroughly meta, signalling a higher‑level, self‑referential observation.
NARRATIVE
I thought it would be impossible for little old me to have any effect on what Google AI provides in it’s AI OVERVIEW. That is why I tried; to see if I could. I could. Within seconds I repeated the very conceited search and was not surprised to see the AI OVERVIEW become… unsatisfactory.
Overall, my opinion is that the intrinsic and monetary value of Google Search has been sorely devalued since it began Google AI Overviews; many are illogical, many contain nonfacts, hallucinations and lose a human perspective, and are presented with no reasonable or rational context.
As I expected, my effect on GOOGLE AI OVERVIEWS was, is and will be forever-more, fleeting, but I have the screenshot which salves my pride forever. I could provide much more exposition on this topic of ‘once upon a time I cofounded a global research foundation’, but you don’t really want to hear about that, because “ya’ll” just want to hear about yourselves. 😆
If there ever was a concept of a Google AI Overview that did not cycle a moveable feast every few seconds, with every keystroke, but rather would stand the test of time what would I like it to say upon entering my conceited search string? The answer is not complex at all. I would like it to recognise that once upon I time I cofounded HSF San Diego in 2005 but that nonprofit no longer exists. I would like it to stress the point that I have no relation, nor connection with, or to, a contemporaneous HS Foundation who has demonstrated to me on a personal and public level that they could not care less about me as a person, nor as person with Hidradenitis Suppurativa.
By the way, I moved beyond bitterness years ago: this scribble here is about the Art of Me, and is about self-reference, me, me, me- it’s not about you, you, you.
‘Things are getting kind of gross And I go at sleepy time
This is not really This, a this, a this is not really happening
You bet your life it is You bet your life it is’ Tori Amos
Now that I disclose all of this and disclose my actions which even now are creating a shockwave ripping through the time/space continuum of Planet Google, I’m sure it won’t take anyone on the planet much effort to erase any future mention of me in relation to this contemporaneous nonprofit. I have shown you the way. 😜
SEE ME (deliberate & ironic choice of word)
Things have changed here on substack since I started scribbling here. Google used to consistently read my blog in the early days, and my blog would often come up in search results. I have since discovered that my blog no longer has a site map, which makes it difficult, but not impossible for Google to read me. I won’t go into the why’s about sitemaps, if you are interested you will look into substack’s policies. So now, not only does my blog have no sitemap, but many of my pages now have a robots.txt which tells google don’t bother reading.
You can judge me, as I judge myself, to be, a conceited human. However, the deeper conversation to have is what effect does money and corporations have on the outcomes of what an internet search engine offers up to you; and the macrocosm- whose message and whose stories about Hidradenitis Suppurativa are moulding the contemporary “HS Community” of today and tomorrow?
META SEARCH or META TWIST
If I do a non-conceitful (ie not googling my self) google search on Hidradenitis Suppurativa, whether it is a generic or highly specific search I often come across a personal meta-paradox:
-the search and the search results are not just about any disease; it is about a disease that I actually HAVE.
-the search and the search results often are connected to my own personal, private and public history.
-the search and the search results also may reveal my personal or professional connection to either specific medical publications, or even to people I have met in person or communicated with
-even mention of global concepts like “Hidradenitis Suppurativa Community” reveal to me, my own emotional and my own historical connection to the content
- an infinitesimally small number of results served up to me on Google in HS Searches, are authored by me, or mention me by name, or my name and American email address from 2005 remains in the metadata of pdfs (and therefore available for Google to read).
In other words, seeing my name returned in a Google Search, my standard internal response is ‘it don’t matter to me what anyone else thinks about me’.
What matters to me is what I think about my self.
Added extra commentary:
HSSTORY (not a typo)Consider the “HS FACTS”:
*A global research foundation for Hidradenitis Suppurativa.
*Created, founded, directed and led by two pwHS.
*Initial funding by two PWHS.
*One pwHS, the founding President, is American.
*One pwHS, the founding VP, Secretary, CFO, is Australian.
*Two European Doctors are founding members of the NGO’s Board of Directors.
Each fact may be disturbing, disconcerting and disorienting for the contemporaneous community of HS medical and pwHS organisations.
In retrospect, my attempts, since May 2016, to correct the public history, my attempts to highlight what I saw as self-serving corporate re-writes of pwHS community social history; my attempts were extremely naive, and even now, may even be a little dangerous.
You cannot tell people with Hidradenitis Suppurativa that they no longer need to hide, while at the same time hiding your own origin. Well you can, but you may lose the respect of everybody, and you may run the risk of losing your own self-respect.
Hopefully it may become apparent to at least one person, be it now or in 2 years, this scribble is not really an exploration of the author's conceit at all. It's radical advocacy.
The 'subtext' reads:
"Fuck! Rob changed the narrative of #pwhs on Google in a matter of weeks, however temporary. He did that without community, without HS Experts and without pharma. It cost him nothing but time, energy and dedication. Future readers may start to understand they are being lied to. Your individual voice, your singular name, your unique never to be repeated human nature, has a high extreme value that can achieve *impossible things*, by yourself. Think twice before you give your voice to others."